Why did our band break up? We were really starting to gel. I don't understand what happened. If the answer to this question was that the musical styles and ideals do not jive then you are one lucky dude. Because usually that is not the answer. If your musical styles do not jive and you see no future, then breaking up was the logical choice. But sometimes, and usually most of the times, musical style is not the culprit.
You have found each other at a club listening to a good band. You know some of the members of the band and they introduce you to someone who plays a killer guitar. You are a bass player, you know a drummer and voila, you have the start of a band. You get together, play and soon add a keyboard and it just goes from there. You spend hours upon hours getting the equipment right, the sound right, the vocals right, everything is falling into place and then....it just disappears. Why? I believe that the start of the process was never really addressed as it should have been. And the specific part that was missing, that caused the demise of the group, the part that was never even discussed were the goals, dreams and aspirations of the other members.
The goals of each individual have to be in line with the entire group. Most musicians just want to play music. And if you are good enough to play on stage with the guys you are with then a common bond occurs in which there is a false sense of security. However, it does not take a lifetime for the real motives behind the music to come forward. Why would you not want to bring those motives into the forefront before wasting all of the time and effort? Why would you not want to know if you are all on the same page business and career wise instead of just music wise? It is puzzling.
I was recently communicating with an outstanding performer from the upper Northwestern part of the U.S. (By the way her name is Lucy Hammond. You should check her out at lucyhammondband.com) We have a lot in common in that we both put careers on hold to raise children. She has jumped back in with both feet but the musicians she has been working with, counting on, and putting so much of her resources into seem to just want to stick their big toe in. Now there is a huge difference between the both feet, all in mind set and the "let me just stick my toe in and if it works then I will be all in," attitude. While she is sacrificing everything, the other players might not be on the same sacrificial level.
Most people that I have known that front a band take on the management roll also. Not by choice I would say, but they are usually the responsible party. Band members that are all in become part of every negotiation and are willing to sacrifice by decision because they have bought into a vision. Band members that just want to know where and when to show up usually take no more interest in the gig than this one motive revealing question: "Do we get free drinks?" That kind of shows what is going on. This is a business. You would not be a partner in any other business enterprise and ask a question like that. Mixing art and business is extremely delicate. One usually kills the other. It is an extremely difficult task to manage. My hats are off to those who can.
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